“The best man is he who most tries to perfect himself, and the happiest man is he who most feels that he is perfecting himself.” – Socrates, Grecian Philosopher.
Perfection in the eye of the beholder – the pursuit of every man. What defines perfection however, has been much debated for centuries. But now, the focus seems to have shifted: it is no longer just about perfection; it is about what it means to be, a man.
No longer are men regarded as protectors, bread-winners and heads of household. This phenomenon has much to do with the rise of a new breed of women who are independent, self-sufficient and even domineering. Likewise, men have also been willing to evolve from old-fashioned, repressed, unmoisturised selves, into a new species – The Metrosexuals
My own path of discovery began at a tender young age of ten, wondering why boys of my age preferred to sink themselves in filthy mud rather than in a bubblegum scented bath.
Selected for being a Paige Boy for countless weddings and being the Master of Ceremony for innumerable events, it slowly got to my head. I enjoyed the attention I got for just looking good. I knew that I could get my own way if I just put on my sweetest smile.
That is why adolescence years dealt me a tremendous blow in my secondary school years. My ultimate archenemy was dealing blows after blows to me. I couldn’t stand the imperfection that each pimple wrote on my face. However, despite the “imperfection”, I had much more girl-friends then the best looking guy in school.
I could talk to girls about anything that interested me, chatting excitedly for hours about that subject ranging from Versace to BioSkin.
My attention span with guys, on the other hand, could never last for more then a few minutes on mundane things in life - such as “Oh! Have you done your homework yet?” It spelt out a communication barrier that I had with the spherical object and mindless violence.
It was not long before I was getting words like ‘fag’, ‘gay’, ‘wussy’ or ‘fairy’ being thrown in my face. My “sister-like” status amongst the female community evoked jealousy amongst the “alpha-males”. I was Quasimodo – stealer of the limelight in their eyes.
In short, I lost my sense of identity almost completely, but the guys that called me names ended up slowly adapting to the vanity culture too.
Shopping dates, facials and relaxation spas were always on my to-do list apart from splurged on cosmetics and clothes and exchanged cooking tips with my “sisters”. I was a man, uncertain of my identity and far more concern on my image. A man… in other words, who is an advertiser’s walking wet dream.
The fashion market belongs to us, yes. I’m referring to the metrosexuals. What would fashion marketers want with guys who couldn’t care two-hoots whether they shaved this morning or styled their hair?
How could you identify a Metrosexual? All it takes to look at them! In fact, if you’re actually looking at them, they’re almost certainly Metrosexual. They, quoting from writer Mark Simpsons, “Can cook, can hold his own when discussing curtain choices and enjoys shopping for everything from clothes to power tools.... But when he gets into a room with men and they are talking about hunting, fishing, basketball, he has no clue what they're talking about.”
The “alpha male” era has passed and given way to those who aren’t as concerned about dating girls as much as the horrid red spots that appeared this morning.
Sylvester Stallone and Hulk Hogan have made way for Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt and David Beckham. All these men are as much models as they are sports stars or actors, welcoming the not-so-furtive female gazes like the walking billboards they've become.
Now that women no longer need men for 'protection,' they can openly say what they really like. In the same way, now that the men no longer have to look strong and tough, they can be whatever they want to be.
Hulk is off their list - they want a cute guy who will be their 'friend'. Who will go shopping with them because they actually like it, and help them find the most matching bra and skirt, rather than act like a bum sitting in on the trial cushion in the furniture shop dreaming of going home, grab a beer, and surf the channels.
In addition, many women want a man who in his essence, scare off many less-adventurous women and of course, all those macho man.
So, if you think you have a cabinet choked full of Armani, Prada and Topman clothes, and your bathroom has as more variety of chemicals then a nuclear arsenal you qualify to be a metrosexual?
According to a British market research, a group of researchers uncovered characteristics of this subculture that went far beyond Simpson's 1994 conception. In addition to their narcissism and fashion-consciousness, metrosexuals were found to be softer, more sensitive, more artistic, more domestic, more romantic, and less interested in business competition.
In the past, if your girlfriend cried, you would whip out your beloved handkerchief your mum gave you for your 10th birthday and dab away her tears. However, now would be different. If your girlfriend cried, you would have to whip out your beloved $250 M.A.C. to restore her complexion and Shu Uemeru moisturizer to revive her tear stained face.
So what are you? Society has tried to classify the new age men in to many, many categories. But if you think that you have what it takes to be the new age man. Check out which of the following neo-males are you.
The SNAG (Sensitive New Age Guy): A guy that women like to talk to like one of their own, and find attractive because they can. Unlike metrosexuality, the title of SNAG refers more to sensitivity, without the narcissism and preening associated with metrosexuality. Think Taiwanese heart-throb Jay Chou and you would be somewhere about there
Renaissance Man: Refers to a well-rounded, sophisticated, worldly individual with interests in many areas and expertise in several. Passionately romantic in his dealing with women, flirting unconsciously yet maintaining the old world charm and poise. Think of artist-engineer Leonardo da Vinci.
Primp: A very well groomed guy who always has women around, but never seems to go for any one in particular. Behind his back, people speculate about his sexuality. Think of Keanu Reeves in award winning box office, The Matrix.
Skexual: A male or female whose sexuality and sometimes even sex, is so impossible to determine that they could walk into a lavatory of the opposite gender and nobody would flinch. Think of Michael Jackson and you would be enlightened
AJ: Derived from Pseudo-Latin which reverses syllables, it refers to a young guy who has identified himself with being a homosexual, and is more then confident of his own identity.
Mirls: Metrosexuals who have gone ultra-feminine. Think of metrosexuals who will buy women’s fragrances if they think it suits them and remind their female counterparts about their best gay friend without being one themselves.
Of course, there are many other terms that people have come up to describe the vast array of modern men, but most would fall under these categories.
It is my dream that one day, I could walk the streets, and people will turn back and give me a second look, and tell their friends that they saw a really good looking guy.
It is my dream that one day, I would walk the streets, and people will turn back and give me second look, and wish that they could look as good.
It is my dream that one day, I would walk the streets, no longer who I was... but a person with confidence about my looks - living up to the code of the metrosexual...
The choice was mine, and mine alone.
I am a metrosexual. And it is my choice to look good. For those that do not need to follow my footsteps and already have looks, thank your lucky genes. But remember, looks will flee faster then you think. If... you do not take the path of the metrosexual...
Perfection. Undoubtedly one of the goals of every man. Changing from time to time, it has come to rest in having a flawless complexion, getting in touch with your feminine side and embracing sensitivity. In short, perfection for men, is to cast away what used to define a man.
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Written By Andrew Hui Kok Fong
DMC 2A02
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